So I was chatting with a girlfriend on the phone and told her this spider story -- to which she replies "That's a Delusional Post!!"
So, here we are.
My daycare is in the basement of my house. I have this big windows that lets in lots of light and it's really not what you think of when you think "basement" -- with the exception of one thing. Creepy crawlies. They happen...very rare in the winter, but they're around during the summer.
This story begins early on a Monday morning. I wake up at 5:15 in the morning. Yes...you read that right. I'm awake at FIVE IN THE MORNING. *pauses for the applause and astonished gasps* Anyhow -- since I'm awake at such an ungodly hour, I don't exactly want my kids and husband awake too -- So, I shower upstairs and then blow dry and primp and preen in the basement bathroom so as not to make too much noise (Yes, covered Muslim women have hair and like to look pretty!! lol)
Anyhow -- the basement bathroom gets used a LOT during the week, but almost never during the weekend. It's an "emergency" bathroom really. It's not that it's old or ugly or anything (we just renovated last year, it had better not be!) but for whatever reason, we just don't use it.
So, I get out the hair dryer, plug it in and tilt my head to start blow drying -- then....I see it. *insert Jaws theme here* A nasty, big, black spider in my toilet. Yes, that's right, he was in the damn toilet!! He was halfway between the water line and the toilet seat.
Now -- I'm a daycare provider...I deal with some of the nastiest things on the planet and there's little that can phase me. I can handle all sorts of bugs with two exceptions. The first is cockroaches (thank GOD there are none in Edmonton...yet) and the second is Spiders. I hate them. I really, really hate them.
So, I think, "Die, bastard!" and I flush.
The friggen thing did not even BUDGE. He held on with his magical spidey grippers and didn't even move during the torrential downpour that is the flushing toilet
I flushed again...no movement...and again ... he moved just 1/2 an inch or so. By this time the battle between me and Super Spidey is well established and I cannot figure out if I'm more freaked out or pissed off. So, I grab my final weapon -- a bottle of shampoo --- and squirt it around the rim of the toilet and flush again. Apparently, the soap was the magical weapon...as it seemed to take away the water tension and the spider-from-hell finally went down the drain.
Not happy with that, I flushed a few (4) more times -- just to be sure he didn't come back...it wouldn't have surprised me.
1 week ago